Kaz Trypuc

Today I learned that twenty years to the day before I was born, a chimpanzee by the name of Enos completed the first orbital space flight by an animal.  He completed his first orbit of the Earth in 1 hour and 28 minutes, returning to Earth shortly thereafter.  His mission was a test run for the now famous Mercury mission flown by Lt. Col. John Glenn that put the first American in space.  Sadly, Enos later died of dysentery.  As proud as I am to share my birthday with the anniversary of a primate's $1.5 billion achievement, I hope I do not meet a similar fate.

Here's to you Enos!

Having only slept 11 hours total in the previous four days I slept half of Monday away. If you've never experienced anything like that, then know that doing everything but sleeping for a few days and then wasting another whole day just sleeping can drive one a little crazy.  Moreover, starting your day at 4pm and not even going outside until 7pm is no way to spend a day off of work.  So, feeling a little stir crazy, I set out to enjoy an evening on the town, during which I sat down to a hearty meal in the corner booth of a little Chinese restaurant.  At the conclusion of my meal I broke open my fortune cookie and read the following fortune:

"GET AWAY FROM HOME AWHILE TO RESTORE YOUR ENERGIES."

Perfect.

While leaving church the other day I was accosted by two individuals asking me to sign a petition to repeal “SB 777.” I’ve either been paying too little attention to state politics or it’s that every media outlet is spending 99% of its airtime on the 2008 presidential election because I had no idea what they were talking about. I looked at the makeshift display and saw in big, bold letters STOP HOMOSEXUAL BILL SB 777. From what I gathered over the next two minutes, as I was talked to in both ears by these chattering volunteers, was that Gov. Schwarzenegger had recently signed SB 777 into law and that once in effect it would alter the definition of gender to now include non-traditional sexual identities, not just the biological condition of being male or female.

The first of several doomsday scenarios offered to me was that boys could now shower with girls in locker rooms. Even worse, such a bill would mandate, in the name of non-discrimination, the teaching of “gay lifestyles and gay history.” Textbooks would be rewritten, I was told. In one final plea to stress the urgency of the matter, one volunteer told me that this would inevitably lead to a variety of other aspects of our society—beyond education—that would forever be altered by homosexuality’s mark. At the end of a long list I was told this included restaurants, though I am not sure what the volunteer meant by this. Will SB 777 require that I eat next to homosexuals in restaurants? That menus along with textbooks will have to be rewritten? Oh, the horror.

I didn’t sign the petition.

Instead, I read the bill itself. In it’s 33 page entirety. Twice.

The two most frightening conclusions drawn by opponents of SB 777—that boys can go into girl locker rooms and that textbooks will be rewritten to promote alternative lifestyles—are, in my estimation, completely unfounded.

Just because John and Jane Doe are fans of Will & Grace and listen to Elton John does not mean that they are irresponsible parents ready to toss their teenage daughters to the lions. Even the most “liberal” of voters I am sure is not suddenly thrilled with the idea of boys and girls showering together (gay or not). If the worst fears of these volunteers were true I am sure these people would be out signing petitions too. And yet they are not. It appears only conservatives and Christians are up in arms over the matter (a Google news search of “SB 777” yields hits from mostly Christian websites). Of course, the opponents of this bill also must not realize that students haven’t showered in school locker rooms after PE in decades. But that is neither here nor there.

In this editorial the staff for the state Senator who introduced the bill are quite clear that this does not mean boys can now shower with girls. For students who are uncomfortable following established “gender” norms alternative accommodations can (and are already) provided. In other words, a homosexual teen boy can now (un)dress in a separate bathroom away from other males, not amidst girls in their underwear on the other side of the building. Locker rooms are not suddenly going to be handed over to the sexual whims of 15-year-olds. Reason will prevail—much to the delight of parents and educators.

On the second matter, though the bill does have an impact on the use of textbooks with a “discriminatory bias,” this has nothing to do with mandating pro-homosexual education. There is no funding here for new programs, no mandates for new curricula, no new requirements for sexual education. The matter is merely relegated to the part of the California Education Code having to do with discrimination—something you’d think both sides would be against.

For the record, I am a Christian. I do not believe that homosexuality conforms to the sexual disciplines required by the Christian life, and neither is a fear of the Other (neighbor, enemy, friend, or stranger) in accordance with it. And though I keep abreast of the political landscape I do not vote. As such, I am moved neither by the bill nor by its opponents.

What I do find maddening, however, is how the political process (on both sides) plays to the fears and ignorance of the people. Using words like HOMOSEXUAL BILL on displays and making “homosexual history” out to be the second-coming of some flat earth approach to education are ways of preying upon the misplaced fears of a paranoid, stereotyping populace. Perhaps we Christians should be forced to eat at the same table as homosexuals so we can get some perspective.

Lastly, I find it frustrating that the Church has yielded so much ground to the State on matters such as this. That Christians are unable to imagine how to go on when the government does not move in lockstep with the Church is but an indication that we have confused what it means to be American (or Californian) with what it means to be Christian. The Church clearly has lost its voice, which is perhaps why it so often feels the need to shout so loud.

Since I do not vote I will not be taking a stand either way on SB 777. I will, however, continue to pray that Christians can be a people of charity. I will pray that the political witness of the Church remains just that, freeing us from having to arrest power for ourselves in the wider world as if the truth of the Gospel is dependant on our ability to defend it—with the pen or the sword.

Overheard on the PLNU campus today:

Girl #1: What's your major?
Girl #2: Liberal Studies.
Girl #1: What's that--psychology?
Girl #2: No, like teaching and stuff.

I did not, could not, make this up.

Many of you know I love a good deal. But in between finding buy-one-get-one-free coupons for my local frozen yogurt shop and snatching extra coupons for oil changes out of my neighbors' mailboxes, I love coming across what I call "a deal of a life time."



Amazon has a four-star 225-lb. elk carcass on sale for $1225! An elk carcass, you say? And for a mere $1225?! The last time I purchased the carcass of cervus canadensis it was well over $2000! Right you are. When this deal comes up in your Goldbox Offers, you do not wait, you do not ponder, you DO NOT hesitate. When you see that mouth-watering carcass and think "that elk carcass sure does look good, particularly with those oranges so skillfully arranged in front of it," you add it to your cart and don't think twice. It's got four stars people!

And hey--Christmas is right around the corner, perfect:

Birthdays, Christmas, Hanukkah, Martin Luther King Jr. Day, Grandparent's Day, etc. are all holidays where a big piece of elk meat could brighten someone's day.

Sadly, however, any dreams you have of sending elk carcass to friends far and near in honor of baby Jesus' birthday are quickly dashed: GIFT WRAPPING IS NOT AN OPTION! I sympathize with Paul, who says,

I would think that half the fun of giving a huge elk carcass would be watching the look on your loved one's face as he or she unwrapped the slab of meat. Unfortunately, Amazon does not think this is so.

What a shame. And just when I was going to be entrusting my gift carcass needs to Amazon. Oddly enough, there is much more going on behind the scenes of Amazon's butcher shop: it says the carcass is 225 pounds but the shipping weight is 180 pounds! What gives?! Dave, of Farmington, KY, asks an excellent question:

Where does the other 45 pounds go during shipment? Does the delivery guy snack on it along the way?

Good question, Dave. Certainly Amazon is misleading us. But beware, potential carcass buyers, the deception runs even deeper. As you find yourself salivating over the photo of the carcass-and-orange arrangement you might notice something unusual, like this Amazon customer did:

This picture is the same one they use for the venison carcass! Venison Carcass?! What are they trying to pull? Are we looking at a dead elk, a dead deer, or what?

It is true. The photo is the same for the 50-lb. deer carcass. While you may be angry at first, consider that two different types of hot carcass are now available at your favorite bookstore. Ten years ago you would've laughed at me hold I told you something like that! As Wendy notes,

no more scouring the country roadside seeking out a tasty tidbit of carrion to weigh down your stylin' El Camino...no, never again! Now, only a couple clicks of the mouse and the UPS man is on his way to your front door, biceps ablazin', luggin' your meaty delight into your hungry arms!

I mean, after all, what a time saver!

How many weekends have you spent, in the loincloth, knife clenched in your teeth, running through the fields trying to find a rabbit? A bunch! All so you can have something to sacrifice on the altar once you get to the cave. Now, with this, you come home, fix a cocktail, go through the day's mail, finish your drink, drive over to the cave, yank this carcass out of the box and offer it at the feet of your dark lord...BOOM, done. You're happy, your dark lord is happy, everybody wins.

So, I guess you nit-picky people could worry about which carcass you're getting from the image, but hey, at the very least you can order a carcass straight from home while watching Dukes of Hazzard or sitting in your backyard. If it's the latter, remember this:

nothing brings the family to the table faster than the smell of a delicious venison carcass roasting over the open firepit in your yard. There's something vaguely primal about sitting around a campfire, woman (or man!) al fresco, carcass juices streaming down your face. Don't bother with napkins, wipe your hands on NATURE, and have a great time!!!

Yes, folks, that's what we call the joy of carcass meat. But what if elk and venison are not your carcasses of choice? What can Amazon offer you besides a $1200 slab of dead animal shipped to you via UPS? Or what if you're looking for something during Easter, not Christmas? How about a cute little bunny rabbit, also in Amazon's exclusive carcass line. Just look at this sucker:

Nothing says 'Eat Me' like a photo of a skinned rabbit carcass! Honestly, the photo just makes you hungry, doesn't it? Doesn't it just remind you of all of those times in biology class when you were just so tempted to try a bite of the putrid fetal pig you were dissecting?

Man, I don't know about you, but that takes me back! As you sink your teeth into the succulent flesh you'll finally know what it's like to be a feral dog. Now, what else makes this different from elk or venison? I'm glad you asked. Mark from Wisconsin offers us this description of the unique flavor of this rabbit:

Contrary to popular belief, rabbit does not taste like chicken - it's more like raccoon or perhaps groundhog. At best, an acquired taste. There are no shotgun pellets, but there is a little gravel and a vague hint of automobile tire. Not for the fainthearted.

Thanks for the tip, Mark.

Now, the rabbit may sound too good to be true, but, admittedly, it does have its drawbacks. When you're done with it you can't sell your own fresh whole rabbit in the "used" section on Amazon. Though it seems unfair for Amazon to have a monopoly on cold, naked, dead rabbits, you can contact user "joeytonz" on Amazon if you want to get this rabbit for even cheaper. Joey even claims it comes with a tiny pair of slacks he sewed on it!

Lastly, Amazon's monopolistic approach to carcass sales has created a market for rabbit parts, as well. As one upset customer points out:

They sell 'FRESH WHOLE RABBIT' but when you order it, there's no head or skin! Can you believe that?! Uh, excuse me, do you think a headless rabbit missing its entire skin is 'WHOLE'??? This is totally misleading. I have contacted Amazon 3 times asking them to please send me the skin, feet, and head so I can have the complete set and they have ignored me or sent me autoresponded emails that don't specifically address the missing head and so on. What they do, I'm guessing, is then resell rabbit heads, rabbit feet, and bloody rabbit scalps on another part of this website, and it's all pure profit. What a CROCK.

The man can't help how he feels. And frankly, I can understand where he's coming from. I recently purchased the Badonkadonk Land Tank from Amazon and it did not include my own army of jawas. I was very disappointed.

Friday night I gathered with some friends to take in the latest installment of the Bourne series starring Matt Damon. After having read the original Robert Ludlum novels and seen the original movie adaptation when I was younger, I have approached the new series with some bias. While the Bourne trilogy worked all the better set against the backdrop of the Cold War and all of its European intrigue, the three new films have done an admirable job of adapting the story and "making it work." Though purists never fully want something to be made to work, these movies could have been a lot worse.

In The Bourne Ultimatum the movie picks up right where The Bourne Supremacy left off: Bourne fleeing through the streets of Moscow after killing the men responsible for his unusual life story. Questions still need to be answered, however, and so we embark on a 110 minute edge-of-your-seat adventure that never lets up. There's not much more to say, really. The movie is as you would expect and though it helps if you've seen the first two films, it isn't necessary.

I is important to note that while Bourne remains haunted by the nightmares of his past life, he performs as the quiet, reluctant assassin throughout the film and is missing some of the personal conflict of the first two. Despite several teases, he never really exhibits his previous killer instinct and instead spends most of the movie either killing in self-defense or not at all. Instead of fighting against the realities of his nightmares in some Freudian battle between his new and old selves (which would be so Hollywood), he ends up just wanting to know the how and the why. Certainly this did not leave much room for Damon's wide ranging abilities, but he remains, convincingly, the tormented Jason Bourne.

Joan Allen (Pleasantville, The Notebook) reprises her role as a CIA agent on the hunt for Bourne, and this time around she is joined by the always capable David Strathairn (Good Night and Good Luck, Sneakers), who plays the win-at-all-costs Deputy Director. They are worthy opponents of Bourne, though you know he will outsmart them at every turn. Julia Stiles also figures briefly into the story, and oddly plays the consummate damsel in distress at one point--something that seemed out of place given her supposed CIA training. The costume designer and makeup artist made her look cute and trendy (complete with blonde highlights)--which makes her stick out like a sore thumb in some scenes. Bourne always appears to be the any-man and shifts perfectly from city to city, language to language, a master of disguise. But Stiles' character looks like a J. Crew model which doesn't help when you're trying to blend in with a crowd of Moroccan market goers.

The fight scenes were well choreographed, the derring-do escapes were creative and usually a mystery right up until the last moment, and there were often moments enough to interject a little dry humor. Many have complained of the jerky camera movements either because it made them sick or because they attribute that to their missing the fights, but it works and it keeps you all the more glued to your seat.

The series ends well, though Bourne makes some appearances in other Ludlum novels, so a fourth film is not out of the question. Given how far the scriptwriters have deviated from the original material they could just as easily create an entirely new fourth film from scratch and we'd hardly know the difference. Given how well each of the three films has been made I cannot say I would hate to see Damon back as Bourne again. The film is somewhat unremarkable due mostly to how much it bleeds into the first two; there is nothing new here. But it is what it is, and that's a fun movie. Now that the story is complete, perhaps a fourth film would let them go in a direction that would really open it up to some new and exciting possibilities.

I've been tagged by Charlie.

The rules:
1. I have to post these rules before I give you the facts.
2. Each player starts with eight random facts/habits about themselves.
3. People who are tagged need to write their own blog about their eight things and post these rules.
4. At the end of your blog, you need to choose eight people to get tagged and list their names.
5. Don’t forget to leave them a comment telling them they’re tagged, and to read your blog.


My Eight Random Facts/Habits:
1. I once had a surgical bilateral orcheopexy. Look it up.
2. When I take a long hot shower, I enjoy sitting on the floor, closing my eyes, and letting the water run over my head like I'm in the rain.
3. My clothes, books, and DVDs are color coordinated in their respective storage areas.
4. I like to make my fridge and cupboards so neat they look like displays in a grocery store. Yet, despite this, I am secretly disorganized with the things that really matter.
5. I buy books at a faster rate than I read them.
6. I long to sing aloud in the car, and am often amused by just how bad my voice really is.
7. In another life I would move to Paris and study to become a chef.
8. Several unfinished personal improvement projects: learning how to sew, learning how to play guitar, learning how to decorate an apartment.

And like all blog memes, this one ends here.

Live Free or Die Hard -- This fourth installment of the classic Die Hard trilogy once again finds NYPD Detective John McClane taking on terrorist-thieves in an action-packed, blow-em-up summer blockbuster. While not one of the later films has lived up to the praise the first one received (which in large part set the standard--and formula--for action movies for the next fifteen years) this one has been met with critical, and to a lesser extent commercial, success. Personally, I find this one on par with the second film, Die Hard 2: Die Harder, but the tie-breaker comes on the 1990 film being set during Christmas (as was the first film). Not because presidential hopeful Fred Thompson guest stars in that one.

The original film, set in 1988, featured high-tech bad guys of the late 80's and so in Live Free the bad guys are once again uber-high-tech hacker-terrorist-thieves bent on leading the nation into chaos while they hijack billions of dollars. Until John McClane gets in their way that is.

Willis returns to old form here and delivers both on big action and tongue-in-cheek humor, providing his own commentary on the carnage to ensue. While many were expecting it, the famous "yippee-ki-yay" line never made it in, which is good because I don't believe it could have appeared like anything other than a popular contrivance and forced Willis into the mode of Samuel L. Jackson's "Snakes on a Mutha-f-ing Plane." Surely we are owed more than that. And so director Len Wiseman (from the Underworld trilogy) lets the story unfold naturally and simply allows for Willis to be Willis (and thus McClane to be McClane). The results are better than expected for a movie riding the coattails of its predecessor 12 years later.

McClane's buddy Sgt. Al Powell fails to make an appearance in this film, but Justin Long from the now famous Mac commercials shows up to provide some comic relief himself and ends up generating some really good chemistry with Willis beyond your typical whiny reluctant hero and tough-guy cop pairing. The tension is played out but not overly so and there is no hug at the end that finally reconciles each to the other (and each to his own demons). Each comes out a little tougher and bloodier than when the movie starts but beyond that the two form a entertaining duo. The main villian, played by Timothy Oliphant, is by far the least intimidating of all the Die Hard villians (perhaps because he has no accent?) but holds is own as a total creep, rather than trying to remake the cold, calculating (and sometimes charming) Hans Gruber from the first film (which really set Alan Rickman's career in motion). For those of you that recall, Oliphant's creepiness was formely on display in Scream 2, and it looks like he pulled from the same bag of tricks.

The action is not overdone but keeps you enthralled nonetheless. Near the end of the film you get a semi-truck versus harrier jet action sequence that perhaps is the most carried away action sequence in the entire series, but it is short lived and so forgettable. What isn't forgettable is the no-nonsense no-holds-barred style of gun battles and fist fights McClane gets in throughout the rest of the film. And Live Free has not been drinking the kung fu Kool Aid the rest of Hollywood has since the Matrix. At one point, while in a fight with the (surprise) solo Asian martial arts character, Willis says "Enough with this kung fu sh*t." And he gets down and dirty yet again. At the end of the movie McClane makes his gutsiest move to date and takes a bullet--intentionally--in a thoroughly awesome display of tough-guyness. That said, I think there were a few times where more ammo clips magically appeared on McClane's body, but such is the most common pitfall of action films.

The movie strayed at times and, as usual, fails to top the original, but still is worthy of the Die Hard name and provides a good summer action flick and opportunity to appreciate what Willis has done for the genre. As I said before this one is close to being as good as the second film so if you are a fan of series, definitely see this one on the big screen.

P.S. If you are a Kevin Smith fan you will especially enjoy his cameo appearance as the hacker "Warlock."

Evan Almighty -- The not-so-anticipated sequel to 2000's Bruce Almighty is a modern day Noah's Ark story starring Steve Carrell (The Office), among some other notable stars (Morgan Freeman once again as God, John Goodman as Evan's loathful Congressional opponent), in an old, tired comedic format that pans to kids and not very smart ones at that. Carrell is Evan Baxter, cocky-newsanchor turned first-term Congressman out to "change the world." Gone is Jim Carrey's charisma from the first film, which can give even mediocre scripts some added luster, and with it any hope for this sequel. Oddly enough, Carrell was funnier supporting Carrey in Bruce Almighty where he nearly stole the show. Note to Hollywood: by now you should know sequels missing their former star never do as well.

While Carrey may have been able to save this script, Carrell, who is an adept comedic actor, hardly deserves the blame for this movie stinking so bad. The acting subtleties that have earned him acclaim in the hit show The Office spend the majority of the film hidden behind a massive beard and Carrell is reduced to concocting funny moments with baboons and birds. Most of the laughs come from him getting hit in the head or the crotch, or from falling off the ark as Evan works through "An Idiot's Guide to Building an Ark." When your big laughs are baboons and crotch-shot slapstick a film can hardly expect it's audience--children or adults--to not think of it as a 90-minute version of America's Funniest Home Videos.

Interspersed in all this is a story about faith and family and about taking the opportunities provided us to do small things to make the world, and our lives, better. While the overblown sentimentality of the film may lure some "faith-based" movie-goers into the theaters, the movie hardly touches upon anything relating to Christianity. God, once again, is here to teach us to do good which in this case means protecting vital natural forests and ending suburban sprawl--all while bringing the family together. It's too shallow and too easy for anyone to take anything away from the film other than a whisp of a feeling that if you had a beautiful wife, three cute kids, and a positive attitude, that's all life is about. Oh, and being nice. Spare me.

The one shining part of this film was Laura Graham (Gilmore Girls) who plays Evan's wife. She is one of the few characters surrounding Carrell the movie spends anytime developing. Graham actually delivers a solid performance and breaks out of her cliched role as the wife of the man who appears to be going crazy. How long can she support his erratic behavior? "You're losing us Evan," she remarks at one point. And so he has. Yet she finds moments to bring a little heartache and even genuine heart-felt laughter into the story, and shows herself to be the only one trying to make this a smart, and warm-hearted family comedy. Of course, Graham's brilliance is easily lost among the other one-dimensional characters, including Evan's congressional staff, who are but walking archetypes and punchlines. The only other supporting actress Wanda Sykes, in fact, has no lines in the film not meant to elicit a laugh. Each time her face shows up, which is only ever for a few seconds, you wait to see what sarcastic comment she is about to utter. It's like the producers kept feeding her a quarter for every joke she could muster up, and they kept paying. For such short contrivances I wonder if Sykes even had fun making this movie. Being rated only PG, the script also lost some of the adult edge Bruce had and so we don't even get to laugh at any pathetic "adult" jokes. At least that would be a step up from baboons and crotch-shots.

Aside from some impressive computer visualizations of the massive ark-building project, there is little in this film worth appreciating. In today's world of high-priced movie tickets, it's best to steer clear of Evan Almighty and rent the original (and watch it again) or Season 2 of The Office.

I am currently waiting outside the Apple Store in San Diego in order to purchase Apple's new iPhone.


In case you've been living in a cave the iPhone is the most anticipated phone since Alexander Graham Bell's and may just be the most hyped piece of technology since the iPod. Yeah, other phones do mp3s, web, email, and pictures. But not like this. That's like saying that "other" mp3 players are like the iPod. Anyone who has an iPod knows they just don't cut it. So when all those things are combined seamlessly in a new phone that has no buttons but a multi-input touchscreen (think Minority Report). Now that's hot. The iPhone commercial:


So far my adventure in line has proven rather fun. Apple staff came out and handed out bottled "smart" water early on (which helped wash down my Santana's breakfast). Rubio's stopped by later to hand out some coupons, which was a prelude to the free burritos they just handed out moments ago. I have made some new friends in line, some of whom had a special "iPhone" cake baked. These people even had t-shirts made for their family just for today!

The one drawback thus far...the annoying female Mac fanatic who is utterly obnoxious and refuses to stop talking. On top of that, she and her buddies in line either dote on Apple and Steve Jobs every chance they get, or launch into scathing critiques of Microsoft.

Anyway, it's been fun and I am getting plenty of time to read another big chunk of Heidegger's Being and Time. Oh, by the way, I am not a nerd.

Update: Apple just handed out free iPhone t-shirts. And five hours to go--plenty of time for more free stuff.

I had attempted to gather a group of finicky movie goers and head to The Reuben H. Fleet Science Center in Balboa Park for an IMAX film. I spent the morning researching the four films playing tonight and found even the brief clips to be awe-inspiring. It has been too long since I last traveled--let alone to Egypt, the Alps, the Pacific Rim, or the Jurassic period of history (the settings for the four films)--and so I am determined to spend a week or so in Paris and Switzerland here again soon. But as for tonight, my virtual trip to such exotic places will not be happening; something about people being busy. Hopefully, tomorrow's attempted group excursion to the OB Street Fair will meet with greater success.

All is not lost however. I spent some time this afternoon catching up on some NPR podcasts and mulling over which might be blog-worthy. But with such a vast selection of interesting topics covered, from the history of democratic movements in the Middle East since the late 1800's to one mathemetician's theory of "the Black Swan"--that which is unpredictable and improbable--and how it fundamentally changes our views of modern economics and social theory, I decided I would ignore my blogging responsibility and avoid the decision making process altogether. I would just savor such treats in solitude.

Ironically, on my way home from dinner I heard two of the shortest and most interesting NPR stories of the past few months and instantly knew I must share them. I guess some producer on The California Report knows to throw a bone to people with no plans on Friday nights:

"Bridget Kinsella was West Coast editor for Publishers Weekly, minding her own business when she received a manuscript from an inmate doing life without the possibility of parole." And then she fell in love. Fascinating story. Listen (6:49)

"Here in California -- a lot of us try to avoid acting our age, at least after we turn, say, 35 or 40. Here’s a story about some folks who are definitely not acting their age. They're heading to Kentucky this weekend to compete in the Senior Olympics. All told, more than 12,000 top mature athletes, ages 50 on past 100, will compete in events ranging from archery to swimming." The two old women who compete in track events could just be the cutest old ladies in the world. Thought I am sure they would scoff at such a characterization, after all, these women do sprints 7 days a week and are 3 times my age. Listen (5:33) (Flickr slideshow of the men's over-70 basketball team).

Now I will turn my affections towards my two current romantic interests--loose-leaf tea and Martin Heidegger's Sein und Zeit. It's less fun than it sounds.

This is not a joke. From the Associated Press (via CNN):


"Bubba" Ludwig can't walk, talk or open the refrigerator door -- but he does have his very own Illinois gun permit.

The 10-month-old, whose given name is Howard David Ludwig, was issued a firearm owner's identification card after his father, Howard Ludwig, paid the $5 fee and filled out the application, not expecting to actually get one.

The card lists the baby's height (2 feet, 3 inches), weight (20 pounds) and has a scribble where the signature should be.

Watch Bubba use his own gun permit as a teething ring.(Video)

So I will be flying off to Charlie's wedding here in a few weeks and would like to bring a gift on board the flight. Partly because I don't like the hassle, partly because I don't trust the highly motivated, dumpster-diving employees of perpetually bankrupt major airlines, I do not check luggage. As such this gift will need to be carried on, though this is not without its own difficulty--the fine folks in black standing behind x-ray machines and waving their magic wands over your crotch.

In planning ahead I spent a few minutes glancing over at the TSA's list of prohibited carry-on items. We all know about how toothpaste, shaving cream, and other "liguids and gels" in containers over 3 oz. cannot be taken onboard the planes. But I noticed a few other oddities in the list. Among the list of items explicitly allowed: "Toy Tranformers Robots." Literally. This entry immediately follows toothpaste on the list of "Medication & Special Needs Devices." I'm glad those suffering from terrible afflictions of the body can have the in-flight comfort of "toy transformer robots." Never have those three words, in that order, appeared in a document of the federal government. I hope.

On the list of items explicitly prohibited, along with common no-brainers like knives, we have: sabres, meat cleavers, and throwing stars. Careful though, the TSA took the time to make sure you also understand such items may be checked in your luggage. I'm glad they cleared that up, too many times have I seen poor little old ladies emptying their pockets of toothpaste, contact lens solution, and...throwing stars. Thanks to this handy online list Grandma now knows to keep those at home! By the way, I know what swords and knives are, but what the hell makes a 'saber' a 'saber'? (Answer)

Anyway, Charlie, I will not be allowed to carry your gift onto the plane, so you and Kara have three choices: a saber, a meat cleaver, or throwing stars. Let me know by the 31st.

Eric, who apparently is no longer "rad" and can now be found at www.ericaustinlee.com instead of his old address, has recently sent an official blog post request to me. I have been juggling a lot of balls this semester--graveyard shifts, a new girlfriend, classes, no vehicle, taxes--and have had no time to blog. I have, of course, a ton of thoughts scribbled down in text files here and there, waiting to be posted and as the summer gets under way I will make those thoughts public.

For now, this post will have to satisfy Eric's Kaz-hunger. But while I have you all listening allow me to highlight some developments in my life of late:

• I have recently started dating a girl by the name of Lauren Wallace (MySpace). She is a fellow PLNU alum (Class of '06) and current grad student in the M.A. in Religion program. She is an avid volleyball player and holds numerous prep records in her homestate of Nevada.


• I recently purchased a pot roast at Vons for $4 and cooked it in my crockpot in typical Kaz fashion--without a recipe.


• I completed a lengthy paper on St. Thomas Aquinas and his contribution to virtue ethics (as exemplified by Hauerwas and MacIntyre). More on this later.


• My apartment is now in Phase III (of IV) in the Master Decorating Plan. That means I still have no stuff on the walls but now I have lamps and magnets on my refrigerator.


• The infamous pink van has passed on. It is survived by Har Mar (the Superstar) himself, several oil spots on the asphalt, and the warranty for the new tires I just put on.


• I have decided to get a cat. I will be taking name suggestions shortly.

Kaz, signing off.

This story from CNN.com highlights why falling in love holds such a strong hold on the mind and body of people. Apparently falling in love can be like being high on cocaine, albeit a natural one. Which is perhaps why a breakup can feel like withdrawal--sick to your stomach, loss of sleep, loss of appetite, etc. Interestingly, the brain reactions differ for love and lust. So perhaps if you're unsure if the other person just wants you for your body you should have them undergo an MRI.

And here's hoping your dealer never leaves you.

"There are three possible parts to a date, of which at least two must be offered: entertainment, food, and affection. It is customary to begin a series of dates with a great deal of entertainment, a moderate amount of food, and the merest suggestion of affection. As the amount of affection increases, the entertainment can be reduced proportionately. When the affection is the entertainment, we no longer call it dating. Under no circumstances can the food be omitted." --Miss Manners' Guide to Excruciatingly Correct Behaviour

"The distinguishing of the experience of the sublime from both the experience of beauty and the commitment to virtue raised for the first time in modernity a theme that helps to define it, namely, the claimed recognition of an aesthetic realm indifferent to the ethical--that garden of delights that nurtures the fleurs de mal." --John Milbank

"Taste Life." --Motto of the Food Network

To my delight, On the Media, a production of public radio WNYC in New York and one of my favorite NPR podcasts, recently offered a fascinating piece about the "pornography of the Food Network" (mp3 here, RealPlayer required).


Many of the similarities lie merely on the surface. There's the repetition and motion of this "kind of caressing camera going over the food, back and forth and up and down...the peach, and the camera going over those peaches again, then Giada, then the peach, then Giada, then the peach." The cheesy soundtracks and the sensual slurps, thumps, and crunches of the food being handled, "Let me just give my eggs a quick whisk [CLICKING, BEATING SOUNDS]. And then we're going to add some cheese [CLICKING SOUNDS]...Mmmm! Peaches are juicy, crunchy from the amaretti cookies. The sugar's caramelized, and it's creamy with the whipped cream."

Your taste buds are already salivating, desiring but the manipulation goes even further because you cannot recreate this recipe in your home no matter how hard you try. No matter how much the Food Network wants you to believe it, you cannot taste anything here, let alone "life." This is a manufactured experience, a choreographed ruse, a simulacrum. Nothing here is real. The 18-35 year old men tuning in still do not cook, but now they do have a beautiful woman in a virtual (but always very personal) kitchen providing this sensual, intimate cooking experience right in their living room. And now Tyler Florence serves the latent sexual and emotional desires of those "desperate housewives" out there by going into their homes and helping them cook before their husbands get home in Food 911. He's the proverbial pizza man or pool boy.


This all has to do with our guts and our genitals. Indeed, as cell biologist Michael Gershon of Columbia has written, there are 100 million neurons in our gut--more than the brain and spinal cord combined--and these control a great deal of our autonomic nervous responses. For food and sex, this all may be a no-brainer.

But of greater importance, is the way in which our detachment from these (fabricated) visual images is really a detachment from the actual (and thus from ourselves) by way of the instrumentalized mechanisms of physiological desire. This is why CNN reporters are exhorted to "get the emo[tion]" (always some gut reaction) and why the media as a whole (from the mainstream to YouTube) is moving us towards a "fascination for nothingness, which is a false fascination, always predatory on the reality it gradually erodes" (Milbank). If you haven't caught the latest synthesis between CNN and YouTube check out iReport.

In this "society of spectacle" (a phrase I believe Milbank borrows from Guy DeBord) our resignation to a mere passive reception of the drama presented to us, is ultimately a dimuniton of being where simulated violence, becomes actual violence. It is then truthful speech, and true love, for our poetics to be caught up not in a nihilistic telos of ending (as all spectacles must do--food, sex, war) but in the surrendering to the liturgy, whereby we are caught up into the Divine. So while we obsess over the satsisyfing of our virtual hunger, the orgasmic climax of sex, and the victory of war, we affirm the self-legitimating ends of our narcissistic gaze upon the scripts of our fantasies instead of being caught up into the Liturgy of the Divine Goodness where our bodies, in all their created goodness, perform without end to the glory of God.

Amid the running commentary friend, pastor, mentor, and teacher John Wright offered me this morning during the H. Orton Wiley Lectures in Theology at PLNU, we also had a a discussion about his writings over recent months in which he remarked how he has a large number of blog posts waiting to be published. Which reminded me of some I still had sitting in fragments on my hard drive. It takes on honest man to know when he's been defeated, especially by himself, so perhaps some day I will finish these thoughts, but for now, I offer mere fragments. Some notable theologians have gotten away with publishing such fragments of their own and while they may not allow for a systematic reading they are nonetheless interesting to ponder. So here they are:

From 11 Nov 2007 reflecting on Living the Sabbath by Norman Wirzba (Grand Rapids: Brazos, 2006):

We've all heard the saying, "I need a vacation after my vacation." Indeed the travel industry today does not specialize in what we might consider vacations or even "holidays" (I've always preferred the British English term), but in flighty escapism. These escapist outings all too often are either a) intruded upon by our constant need to remain "connected" through the likes of cell phones, internet, TiVo, and voicemail; or b) stress-inducing trips packed full of commitments to attractions, relatives, and time tables in an effort to "maximize" our time away. One doesn't want to "waste" their vacation, but of course, in one sense, isn't that what vacations are for? So Wendell Berry's quote in the foreword helps set the stage for understanding the Sabbath as not just a day in the week, but a mode of living that shapes our entire lives.

To rest, we are persuaded, we must "get away." But getting away involves us in the haste, speed, and noise, the auxiliary pandemonium, of escape. There is, by the prevailing definition, escape, but there is no escape from escape. Or there is none unless we adopt the paradoxical and radical expedient of just stopping (11).

Just stopping--I like that idea. When our dominant forms of escapism seem to be the internet, the television, and vacations characterized more by cell phone use and email than quality time with family, you know something is wrong with our concept of rest. So just stop. I confess it doesn't seem like much fun to me, but when I am constantly checking my work email on weekends, I have to admit I am not doing much better. Even when I think I've stopped, I've really just escaped into another place where I am anything but who I was created to be. Our lives seems so inhuman at times. But as Wirzba offers by way fo contrast, "Sabbath life is a truly human life."

Today, I purchased a pink soccer ball for $2.99 at Ross:


Also of note: Number of vases purchased today? Two. Bringing my lifetime total to...two.

For those who missed the opportunity (sadly!) to hear Gustavo Guttierez and Justo Gonzalez speak at USD back in October there is another great local lecture here in San Diego:



Dr. Elizabeth Schussler Fiorenza, the Krister Stendahl Professor of Divnity at Harvard Divinity School, will be speaking on the topic of "The Power of the Word: Scripture and the Rhetoric of Empire" at UCSD, February 22 as part of the annual Burke Lectureship. The lecture will "explore not only how the power of empire has historically shaped Christian Scriptures but also how it continues to shape our self-understanding and public discourse in the present." Past Burke speakers have included Father Hesburgh, Stanley Hauerwas, Elie Wiesel, Elizabeth Johnson, Hans Kung, and Marjorie Suchocki among others. I was able to hear two of those in recent years and they did not disappoint.

The topic sounds very similar to the topic of discussion at the the Ekklesia Project summer gathering back in 2005: "No Other Gods: Keeping the Commandments in the Face of Empire." Charlie posted mp3s of Sylvia Keesmat's (author of Colossians Remixed) and AKM Adams' addresses dealing with Scripture and Empire, and the Decalogue respectively:

-Sylvia Keesmat, "The Bible and Empire" (right-click and save as)
-AKM Adams, "The Strong Right That Holds For Peace" (right-click and save as)

Fiorenza is a feminist theologian so it will be interesting to see what additional insight that perspective gives her. See you there!

Eric has tagged me, so here it goes...

Name three (or more) theological works from the last 25 years (1981-2006) that you consider important and worthy to be included on a list of the most important works of theology of that last 25 years (in no particular order).

1. The Politics of Jesus, John Howard Yoder--the book that got so many people rethinking Jesus. It lays the groundwork for so many of today's radical understandings of Jesus' life and ministry. I realize this does not fit into the above timeframe, but I don't care. This is all hypothetical anyway.

2. Theopolitical Imagination, William Cavanaugh--this book is short and by no means his best, but it brings together so many threads from so many different places that it's hard to overlook. Tying together sociology, theology, liturgics, political theology, Christian ethics, history, pre- and post-modern philosophy, and Biblical theology it does no less than provide a primer for Christians to reimagine the whole of space and time.

3. Paul Among the Postliberals, Douglas Harink--like Cavanaugh's this book draws from a wealth of resources. In collapsing theology, philosophy, ethics, sociology of religion, and Biblical studies into one (through the Apostle Paul) Harink relies on an all-star list: Barth, Berkhof, Cavanaugh, D'Costa, James D.G. Dunn, Stephen Fowl, Frei, Paul J. Griffiths, Hauerwas, Yoder, Milbank, Richard B. Hays, Kallenberg, Lohfink, Lindbeck, Placher, Stackhouse, Stendahl, Stout, Volf, Wink, NT Wright, and Yoder. No easy task but he succeeds admirably and brings Paul (and thus Jesus) into a whole new light.